a crash

I've been waiting for the return of nice weather with so much anticipation. There's so much to do and the things I've done up until now have been so satisfying. In addition to rebuilding that one little bed in front of the greenhouse I've moved some plants, improved the edge of the patio under the crab apple tree and replaced some of the stones I pulled out of the edge of the patio to plant the dwarf elberta spruces. I didn't like the spruces there and so have returned them to pots, their effect in pots is so good. Now I want to rebuild the top third of the dry stream, finish finessing the patio stones, redo the area behind the big gate so that I can store tools and the composter, and a dozen other things I think I need to do.

But today was a really brilliant day and all I could do was sleep. I was so fatigued and in so much pain that even wandering around trying to decide what to do was too much. Maybe tomorrow I can do something. To help me be at peace with this need for rest I made myself go and look at old pics of previous seasons. This is an example of how good the gardens can be. I really love it here.

Significant of the flaw in my thinking about the garden is the fact that I have rarely let anything grow anywhere for more than two years before I decide it needs changed. I need to appreciate how wonderful it is as is. Here again, I'm struggling, and the thing I am struggling with is of my own creation, another thing which is really nothing.