When you've got a plan and someone makes suggestions and comes up with other ideas, what is that? I think they believe that they are trying to help and I know it's human nature to believe that one's own ideas are better than those belong to someone else, how would we survive if this were not so? But I also think it's an attempt on the suggester's part to assume control, assert dominance. Therefore, I as the suggestee, feel threatened and discombobulated when the new ideas are put forward. Still, I want the suggester to feel the rights of involvement, and I want their feedback, so I end up stumbling over my own insecurities, fuming to myself, and trying my best to do the thing suggested. What is that?
After a while there's a balance to be found between keeping to one's own plan and including the ideas of others, of course there is, that is the only way to accomplish what one has set out to do. But what if there's no need for any of it? Maybe the need for the accomplishment only exists in the mind of the planner?
Some time in the early 1800's a rich man from New York decided to build his wife a mansion in the remote and beautiful Unaweep Canyon in Western Colorado. She never lived in it. Perhaps he had a plan?
The Tao Te Ching says (paraphrasing) a sage (wise person) does not hold on to his own ideas. therefore he is not threatened or disappointed. I have made some progress, but I am not a sage.
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